follow Tommie on twitter

Thursday, December 28, 2006

Politically Correct Phrases...

...for referring to the opposite sex in '007:

1 She is not a "BABE" or a "CHICK" - She is a "BREASTED AMERICAN."
2. She is not "EASY" - She is "HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE."
5. She does not "NAG" you - She becomes "VERBALLY REPETITIVE."

1. He does not have a "BEER GUT" - He has developed a "LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY."
2. He is not a "BAD DANCER" - He is "OVERLY CAUCASIAN."
4. He is not "BALDING" - He is in "FOLLICLE REGRESSION."
5. It's not his "CRACK" you see hanging out of his pants - It's "REAR CLEAVAGE."

Wednesday, December 27, 2006

Heatherless Headlines

Tuesday, December 26, 2006

One Dumbass Story

Woman With Two Wombs Delivers Three Babies
POSTED: 12:34 pm EST December 22, 2006

LONDON -- A woman in Great Britain with two wombs has given birth to triplets.

One child came from one from one womb, two from the other.

Hospital officials in Bristol announced that that the case is believed to be a medical first. The babies were born in September.

They're reported in good health. (

Copyright 2006 by The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.

I love that the line in yellow was clarified for us in the article... - T

Sarahless Headlines

Friday, December 22, 2006

Sarahless Headlines

Thursday, December 21, 2006

Things Rediscovered While Moving, Part 1

While moving into my new house, I've uncovered a few interesting little treasures. Because I'm a pack rat who never throws anything out. And so is The Beloved Kim.


A bag of Gummi Vampire Bats, from Germany. A gift from my former Brother-In-Law, who lives in Kiel (I think it's Kiel), probably three years ago.

I never had the heart to open them, because of the kitsch value of having a bag of Gummi Vampire Bats. For some absurd reason, they make me laugh.

You can't tell from this picture, but the little kid in the Dracula cape has fangs. Nice.

Heatherless Headlines

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Heatherless headlines

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

As Van Halen Turns

The Van Halen saga continues. Earlier this year David Lee Roth said a reunion was "up to" Eddie and Alex Van Halen. But now, in an interview with Guitar World, Eddie says it's up to Dave. "I'm telling Dave, 'Dude, get your ass up here and sing, bitch! Come on!' As it stands right now, the ball is in Dave's court. Whether he wants to rise to the occasion is entirely up to him, but we're ready to go." The we is Eddie, Alex and Eddie's 15-year-old son Wolfgang, which means Michael Anthony is indeed out. "Wolfgang breathes new life into what we're doing," Eddie says. "He's only been playing bass for three months, but it's spooky. He's locked tight and puts an incredible spin on our stuff. The kid is kicking my ass! He's spanking me now, even though I never spanked him. To have my son follow in my footsteps on his own, without me pushing him into it, is the greatest feeling in the world." A spokesman for Van Halen had no comment, and Roth's spokeswoman tells us, "I am aware of the Van Halen news. Dave will not be able to comment until after the holidays." Van Halen last toured in 2004 with Roth's replacement, Sammy Hagar. (Premiere)

Heatherless Headlines

Tuesday, December 12, 2006

Jesse Ventura Says You Got Time To Bleed Tomorrow

Tuesday Rock Roundup


The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame will announce its 2007 inductees on January 8th. Nine acts were nominated and five will be inducted. The nine acts are Van Halen, R-E-M, Patti Smith, The Stooges, The Dave Clark Five, Chic, Joe Tex, Grandmaster Flash and the Furious Five, and The Ronettes. To be eligible for induction artists had to release their first single or album at least 25 years before the year of nomination.

According to Britain's News of the World, Paul McCartney will fork over 235-million dollars to his estranged wife Heather Mills. The paper says his daughters -- Stella and Mary -- persuaded him to agree to the settlement because they are concerned about his health. He will give Heather 19-point-five-million dollars, most of which she will donate to charity, as well as a secret package of five-point-nine million a year, 15-point-seven to buy homes in Europe and America, five-point-nine million for a U-K home, and close to four million a year for staff and expenses for 15 years.

Britain's Daily Mail reports that Rod Stewart and Penny Lancaster will get married next summer at a 16th-century estate outside Edinburgh [pr: Edinboro], Scotland. The estate has 15 bedrooms, with an additional 12 suites adjacent to the house, as well as a banquet hall, an 18-hole golf course and a heli-pad. Stewart's father was born nearby, which is one of the reasons why he wants to get married there. This will be Stewart's third marriage.

Don Felder's lawsuit against his former Eagles bandmates will now reportedly be settled on January 19th. He recently appeared on an episode of V-H-1's Really Rich Real Estate in which he tried to broker a deal for someone to buy Michael Jackson's Neverland Ranch. Felder's fiance is a real estate agent.

Frank Sinatra was born on this day in 1915. I mention this because he's The Chairman.

There's no new CDs worth mentioning out today, but new DVDs include:

World Trade Center
Talladega Nights: The Ballad Of Ricky Bobby
The Fox & The Hound 2
The Devil Wears Prada
two more of those Ultimate Bond collector sets
and a 4-Disc version of The Lion The Witch And The Wardrobe

Sports for Tuesday

Rex Grossman rose to the challenge of the national spotlight last night and led the Bears to a 42-27 win over the St. Louis Rams. Rex was 13 of 23 for 200 yards while Bulger threw for 356 yards on 55 attempts and looked good for the Rams in the loss. Hester returned two kicks for touchdowns, giving him six for the year, and NFL Record. Next Sunday at noon the Bears will host...and the beat the crap out Tampa Bay Buccaneers.

The long national nightmare is over...the Pleather Basketball is gone December 31st. The NBA's first synthetic basketball, the micro-fiber brainchild of commissioner David Stern, has been the source of complaints from almost every player in the league. The leather balls return at the start of the new year.

The Chicago Bulls did a good job with the outgoing ball last night, beating the struggling Pacers 106-91. Ben Gordon had 23 points and Big Ben Wallace grabbed 13 boards. Seven players hit double figures as the Bulls won for the 5th time in their last 6 games. The Bulls have also made it clear that they are NOT one of the teams in the hunt for Allen Iverson, who's locker has been cleaned out at Philly.

White Sox Catcher AJ Pierzynski was involved in a fight with Cardinals Shortstop and World Series MVP David Eckstein on Sunday. Sort of. The event was part of a Total Non-Stop Action Wrestling Pay-Per-View event. Highlights from the event will be on Spike TV Thursday Night.

The Chicago Blackhawks visit St. Louis tonight. Bulls are off. Both teams have 11 wins and are in third place in their divisions.

Monday, December 11, 2006

Heatherless Headlines

Sunday, December 10, 2006

Sports for Monday

The Colts are the second seed right now in the AFC after being dropped by the Jacksonville Jaguars 44 to 17. Peyton rushed for a touchdown, threw one pick, and ended up 25 for 50 with 313 yards in the loss. The Colts D...worst in the league against the run...gave up 375 yards on the ground. San Diego takes over the top spot in the AFC after slapping down Denver 48 to 20. LDT scored another 3 touchdowns. Minnesota stopped Detroit 30 to 20. The Bears still own the top seed in the NFC and the best lead in the league...they play tonight in St. Louis. Craig will be in the stands with some form of frosty beverage.

The Bulls were off last night and host the Pacers tonight. The Pistons are off until Wednesday. The 76ers are reportedly going to trade Allen Iverson either tonight or tomorrow...a couple of multiple-team trades are on the table. Speculation is that he'll possibly land in Minnesota when all is said and done.

The Chicago Blackhawks pulled off another win on the home ice last night, beating Edmonton 4-1. The 'hawks are unbeaten in regulation in their last 7 games. Chicago also signed veteran forward Peter Bondra to a one-year contract. He's a five-time all-star just two goals shy of 500-lifetime.

Fifth-year Ohio State quarterback Troy Smith was the closest to unanimous choice for the Heisman Trophy over the weekend. He picked up over 85 percent of the national vote. ESPN reports that Notre Dame QB Brady Quinn, also a candidate, said "I would have voted for Troy. I really think he did a great job all year not allowing the pressure to get to him, doing a good job for his team and getting his team to the national championship game." Notre Dame has been at seven Heismans and holding since Tim Brown won in 1987. For the second consecutive season, a school has pulled even with Notre Dame. Last year, it was USC. Now the Buckeyes have won their lucky seventh.

After all the hype with the 51 million dollars to talk to the man, talks between the Boston Red Sox and Japanese Pitcher Daisuke Matzusaka are dying, and a deal is not expected to be struck before the dealine Thursday.

First there was Paul...then there was Mick...and now there's Prince. For the third year in a row, a Rock and Roll Hall of Fame act will headline the Super Bowl halftime entertainment. This time it's Prince. The Purple One, six-time Grammy winner and nominated for five more this year, will play at the game in Miami on Feb. 4.

Friday, December 08, 2006

Jim y John

This is an important day in rock history, worthy of a little of your attention.

Today in 1943, Jim Morrison was born. I recommend digging out Waiting For The Sun and having a bit of whiskey.

Today in 1980, I was watching Monday Night Football at my Dad's work, aged ten, and Howard Cosell told me that my favorite Beatle was dead. Yes, I had a favorite Beatle at the age of ten. C'mon: if you listen to the show you know I'm an odd little man.

Thursday, December 07, 2006

Heatherless Headlines

School Closings/Delays

Benton Harbor Charter School Academy - Closed Thursday

Benton Harbor Schools - Closed Thursday

New Prairie United School Corp. - 2 Hr Delay and No AM Kindergarten

Heatherless Headlines

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

Heatherless Headlines

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Heatherless Headlines

Monday, December 04, 2006

Tuesday Rock Roundup

The Who's world tour will not run through next fall as planned. On his website [], Pete Townshend writes, "It now looks likely that this tour will end in July 2007 rather than continue until the autumn. That means our proposed return trip to Japan and Australia may be postponed for a while." He also says that he and Roger Daltrey asked drummer Zak Starkey to become a permanent member, but he declined. Starkey, whose father is Ringo Starr, also works with Oasis. Starkey and The Who are in Grand Rapids, Michigan tonight.

Bass player Michael Anthony is apparently just as clueless as his fans when it comes to the future of Van Halen. On his website [], he writes, "I don't know exactly what the next year will bring, but whatever happens, I'll keep all of you posted as to what is happening in my world. Have a safe and rockin' holiday season and don't bash it up too hard. I'll definitely see you in 2007!" Word has it that if Van Halen reunites in 2007, then Eddie Van Halen's 15-year old son, Wolfgang, will play bass. Eddie is upset with Anthony for touring with Sammy Hagar before their 2004 reunion tour, as well as with Hagar as The Other Half this past summer. The only way Anthony was allowed to be part of the 2004 reunion tour with Hagar was if he gave up his rights to the Van Halen name and came on board as a hired hand.

In other Bass player news...Aerosmith was joined at their corporate show Sunday night in New York by bassist Tom Hamilton, who has been sidelined with throat cancer. Still no word if he'll be on hand when the band resumes its tour with Motley Crue tonight in Montreal.

U-2 brought back memories of their "Where the Streets Have No Name" video shoot on Friday when they performed two songs on a Tokyo rooftop for a Japanese T-V show. They played "Vertigo" and their new song, "Window in the Skies." On March 27th, 1987, U-2 brought Friday afternoon traffic to a standstill when they filmed "Where the Streets Have No Name" on a Los Angeles rooftop. U-2 wrap up their Vertigo tour Saturday in Honolulu.

A 1968 Fender Stratocaster that belonged to Hendrix but had been kept at the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in Cleveland for the past decade sold for 168-grand at auction yesterday at Christie's in New York. Items from The Beatles, Jim Morrison, and Bob Marley also did well.

The KISS Alive 1975-2000 collection that is being sold at Best Buy stores contains two bonus tracks -- "2000 Man" and "God of Thunder." But the first shipment of the album did not contain the discs, which has led to Universal Music having to manufacture replacement discs for those customers who purchased the set without the bonus tracks. The discs will begin shipping direct to Best Buy stores on Wednesday.

The Bethel Woods Center for the Arts, which sits on the site of the original Woodstock festival in Bethel, New York, is looking for memorabilia from the three-day festival for a museum that will open next year. Curators are looking for tie-dyed shirts, signs, guitars, snapshots, pieces of the trampled fence and other items from the 1969 concert, as well as other artifacts from the '60s. I wonder if they'll be able to scrape up any of that brown acid.


Yes - Essentially Yes (5-CD box set)


Don McLean - Starry, Starry Night
The OH in Ohio
Miami Vice: Dir. Cut
Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest
"Saturday Night Live": 1st Season
"24": 5th Season

WISH LIST for the Ronald McDonald Family Room at Memorial Hospital

The Ronald McDonald Family Room at memorial Hospital of South Bend could use some help this year. They are looking for:

  • Gift cards for perishable food items at Sam's Club/Wal-Mart, Martin's, Meijer, or Target.
  • Pop Tabs (for recycling) the Family Room at 574-674-3020 to learn more.
  • Food, such as Tuna, Mac & Cheese, Individual Cream Jackets, Canned Fruit, Spaghetti Sauce, Stewed Tomatoes, Tomato Sauce, Apple Juice, Soup, Decaf or Regular Coffee, Squeeze Bottles of Mayo, Jelly or Jam, Instant Mashed Potatoes, Rice.
  • Frozen Foods: 1 lb pkgs of hamburger, Hot Dogs, Chicken Breasts, lunchmeat in 1lb pkgs, individual cheese slices, Family Size frozen casseroles, frozen OJ.
  • Household Items: Paper Goods, Laundry needs, Dishwasher soap, Glass/Stovetop Cleaner, Plastic Utensils, Aluminum Foil, Vinegar, Storage Bags, Paper Plates, Cups.
  • Postage Stamps
  • Personal care items like deoderant, toothpaste, toothbrushes, disposable razors, shaving cream.

Please help out this holiday season and support the Ronald McDonald Family Room and all the great work they do all year, every year.

Heatherless Headlines

Friday, December 01, 2006

School Closings for December 1st

Coloma Community Schools

Dowagiac Union Schools

Eau Claire Public Schools

Hartford Public Schools

Lake Michigan Catholic Schools

St. Joseph Catholic in Watervliet

Watervliet Public Schools

Heatherless Headlines

Big-ass storm coming

As usual, our buds at Stormteam 16 will keep you posted...